How To Stop a Bully


  1. MAKE FRIENDS.  Bullies become bullies because they were once bullied themselves.  Believe it or not, the traits that make one a bully are the exact same ones that allows someone to be bullied.  There isn’t a bully alive who doesn’t need admiration and respect.  Think of a way to befriend that bully.  Face your fear and ask the bully for help—how to play basketball, or offer to help the bully with something you know how to do—math homework.  Think on your feet!
  2. USE HUMOR.  Make the bully laugh.  Throw the bully off guard by telling a funny joke, or saying something that you know the bully will find laughable.  You want to make fun—but not make fun of the bully.  Turn a threatening situation into a funny one.  Even making a joke about yourself.
  3. USE CLEVERNESS.  Use creative imagination to resolve the conflict.  When a bully threatens to touch you in some way, you can say you have poison ivy, and run away.  You can make athe bully look in another direction while you run away.  He goalis to stop this fight before it starts, in any way you can.  Running away is a good way.
  4. WALK AWAY.  Don’t get into it.  Walk away.  This is a simple and often-overlooked way to end conflict before it ever begins.  No matter what the bully says, keep walking.  You can look at the bully or not look at the bully.  Just walk away.  There’s nothing cowardly about walking awasy from a bully.  It’s a simple way to end conflict before it begins.
  5. AGREE WITH THE BULLY.  If a bully insults you, agree with him/her.  There’s nothing cowardly about trying to make the bully feel more calm.  By agreeing with the bully, you take the wind out of his or her sails.  By agreeing, there is no fight—and that’s your number-one goal.
  6. REFUSE TO FIGHT.  This probably sounds contrary to what you’ve always been told, but one way to stop conflict is to not fight, no matter what happens.  Just say no.
  7. STAND UP TO THE BULLY.  When a bully threatens you, stand up to the bull—face to face.  This can work, but it can also make some bullies angrier.  You must decide if you think this alternative will work for you.  If the bully gets angrier, try something else.
  8. SCREAM/YELL.  A good shout or yell (kiai) can shock and distract the bully for a moment, giving you time to get away.  Develop your shout or yell.   Learn how to deliver one from deep inside yourself.
  9. IGNORE THE THREAT.  This is similar to simply walking away.  You hear the threats and you turn and walk away from the bully, even though the bully is calling you a coward and trying to get you angry enough to react.
  10. USE AUTHORITY.  Call a teacher, a police officer, a parent, or someone you know who can help stop the bully from hurting you.  This is not being a “stool pigeon or snitch.”  This is finding a way to stop a fight and resolve a problem.
  11. REASON WITH THE BULLY.  If you are a good talker, perhaps you and the bully can talk it out.  If you don’t argue or get angry, if you act friendly, you might convince the bully to not hurt you.
  12. TAKE A MARTIAL ARTS STANCE.  As a last resort, take a strong martial arts stance, even if you’ve never trained it may throw the bully off.  They don’t really want to be in a fight, they just want to show everyone they are tougher then you.  This tells the bully that you are prepared to protect yourself if you are attacked and that my be enough.  But hopefully, one or more of the first eleven ways will work, and you won’t have to use your physical skills.

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